Scrapple & Eggs

I’m a pizza fanatic.

 Like Christoper Walken to the cowbell, I got a fever. And the only prescription, is more pizza.

I go out for pizza, and I have to go large pie. Even if it means bringing half of it or more home with me. It just doesn’t make sense to go medium pie. Medium pies are miniscule compared to the big, and there’s usually like a 2 dollar difference in price. As a result, I usually have some cold pizza in my fridge on any given day of the week.

Being the pizza connoisseur that I am, I aim to try to recreate that fresh hot pizzeria taste with my leftover slices.

Forget the microwave. Pizza disaster. Oven baking or skillet frying…..ehhh. Here’s the ticket, and you can thank me later.

Foreman Grill!

That’s right. That lean mean fat grilling machine is the best appliance you own for reheating a two day old, cold slice of heaven. You got heat from the bottom and heat from the top, combining to give those slices a warm crispy bottom crust and bubbly cheesy top…almost….I said ALMOST….as good as when it was first out of the oven.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Won’t the Foreman Grille crush my pizza and turn the cheese into a burnt mess?  Why, yes, it will. If you don’t use my patented formula for success.

Grab a candlestick holder, a DVD case, a tall pepper can….whatever the hell you can find that’s the right size, and prop the top of the grill up just high enough so that it doesn’t touch the cheese. Plug it in, check on it occassionaly, and take it off when the cheese is at desired level of doneness. Takes about 4 minutes.

I shouldn’t have to tell you these things.

Let it be known that Reduced Fat Cheez-Its taste exactly like regular fat Cheez-Its. Normally I don’t care about that kind of thing, but it turns out I’m getting fatter than expected.

 I discovered this phenomenon (the Cheez-Its, not the fattening up) on a long trip back to Delaware from Busch Gardens. We had packed a bag of munchies for the trip, and someone passed me the Cheez-Its. One look at the box that read “40% less fat” had me skeptical. Who would have purchased such a shitty product? Certainly not I. But 10 handfuls later, I was a believer.

 I mention this because Cheez-Its of all flavors and fat content were on sale when I went shopping today. Thus, I purchased 4 boxes of the “Diet” Cheez-Its, so that I can tell my wife that I am finally eating healthy.